As a Manchester United supporter who was born and grew up in Bristol, I have long been the subject of derision. There are loads of jokes. How many United fans does it take to change a light bulb? Answer: 480,001 - one to change it, 80,000 to say they've been changing it for years and 400,000 in the Home Counties to buy the replica kit. (And so on: that's a gentle example.) Let it not be said, however, that I'm one of those part-time, long-distance fans who's never set foot inside Old Trafford. I went in 1977, when I was nine. Bristol City, during their brief spell in the top division, squeezed an away win: it was divine retribution for disloyalty to my hometown.

LRB 22 June 2006 | PDF Download